Thank you ladies for some really good, thought provoking comments on this topic. Everyone please go to the comment section of the previous post on this subject (Submit or Obey our Husbands? April 29) and read these comments.
My thoughts: I believe they both require obedience, but submitting involves placing ourselves in that position of surrendering to our husbands authority. Where a child is born under our authority and must obey us, as wives we must surrender to the authority of our husbands. Our husbands should not have to demand our submission, it should come from a heart of love and wanting to please him and God.
I'll be honest, it took me a really long time to learn this. But Gods way is always best. There was a time that I wanted to be the boss in our home. My husband has not always served God and so I didn't trust his decisions, especially when it came to the children (actually, even if He was serving God, I don't know if I would have been any more trusting or submissive). They always came to me for questions and permission to do things. I pretty much did what I wanted most of the time. The more I learned about submission, I realized how wrong I was. I also realized I was carrying a load of responsibility that God never intended for me to carry. Women feel like they are placing themselves in bondage by submitting to their husbands, but the opposite is true. I could not believe how freeing it was to give the responsibility that I had been carrying to my husband where it belonged and place myself rightfully under his leadership. I remember the first time I sent my child to their father to ask permission for something (although I was really wanting to answer it myself and I was dreading his answer). It was something I really felt he should decide. When he gave his answer I was shocked! It was exactly what I would have wanted. It seems trusting and submitting to God and trusting and submitting to our husbands go hand in hand. When he realizes the whole family is his responsibility and under his authority, I believe he will take his position under God more seriously.