Reaching Beyond Our Four Walls

As homemakers, sometimes it can be very easy to become consumed with "our" family, "our" house, "our" selves and forget to reach out to others. Once upon a time I copied this note down from somewhere and it has been a great reminder to me to not be so self centered. I thought I'd share it with you:
"Never let one day pass when you have not reached out an arm of love to someone out side your home (and in) with a note, a letter, a visit, help in some way."

What's Stressing You Out? What Do You Need To Lay Down?

This time of year can be very stressful. As if us ladies didn't already have enough to do, now we have to think about decorating, gifts, parties, Christmas dinner, and on and on. If we're not careful our spiritual lives suffer. Isaiah 26:3 says, " Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee..." . Christmas is supposed to be a time of remembering and celebrating Jesus and His birth anyway, isn't it? If you're finding yourself stressed out, ask yourself if your mind is truly on Jesus? If it is, you should be at peace.
I know that a lot of the stress comes from the added financial burden that comes with the holidays. However, Hebrews 12:1 says, "...let us lay aside every weight...which doth so easily beset us." I'm not saying not to celebrate, but think about what is truly weighing you down. What's getting your mind off of Him? Is there a way you can make things simpler and less costly for yourself and your family this year? Is it really necessary to exchange gifts with all of the people that you do? Are you trying to not look cheap and impress with the gifts you give? Give something inexpensive, but fun this year. I think I'll share some of my own ideas and things we are doing in my next post. Anybody else want to share some of their own ideas?

Put Yourself First

Doesn't the title of this post sound like such a worldly way of thinking? Does it go against the grain of everything you believe? Me too, but, there are times to put yourself first. What are some instances in which we should put our self first?
1. Our spiritual lives-I've been reading the book "The Gentle Ways of the Beautiful Woman" a practical guide to Spiritual Beauty by Anne Ortlund. Today the exercise at the end of the chapter was to write down all the things you do with your time, and in prayer, give each area to God to do with as He wants, and also, to write down all the bad circumstances in your life and thank Him for each one(1 Thess. 5:18), and turn each one over to Him asking Him to heal your thought life concerning your worry, resentment, control, etc. over each one. As I did this and was praying, I thought about how important this was that I was praying these prayers for myself. Before I try to help anyone else or pray for anyone else, it's important that my own heart is right. I need to make sure my own ways please the Lord before I start trying to help someone else,otherwise, I just end up stressed, resentful, and wondering if this is the way the christian life is really supposed to be.Sometimes, especially as moms, we spend so much time trying to teach our children to live right, and praying for them, that we neglect our own personal prayer, study, learning time, which should be foundational. "The more of us is invisible, hidden from the world in quiet, in study, in planning, and in prayer, the more effective our visible life will be" (Catherine Marshall, Adventures in Prayer). How can we be effective in leading even our own families to the Lord, if we haven't first, prepared ourselves, and laid our own hearts open before God.
#2 Our health-My mom told me recently, "If you don't take care of yourself, no one else will." This is true. And, how can we take care of our families if we ourselves are weak and sick. Besides, our example speaks louder than anything to our kids.
#3 Our appearance-I don't know about you, but, my natural tendency has always been to get up and start getting everything else rolling before I take too much thought to what I look like. But, ladies, time to make ourselves look at least worth looking at, needs to come pretty high on our list of priorities in the mornings. Who wants to wake up to a mom that looks like she would love to be in bed herself? And, when your husband goes off to work, he doesn't need to go from someone who is not very appealing to look at and whose breath is repulsive, to a place where the women are pleasing to look at, smell nice, and carry on pleasant, lively conversations. He is human.
Putting ourselves first is not always a selfish thing. It can actually give us the peace, joy, and strength that we need, to then give ourselves to others.

A Few Advantages of Being a SAH Wife

• I was able to go, without previously planning to, help my daughter clean and get situated in her house (previous tenants left a huge mess). I only needed to discuss it with my husband, who was all for it, pack my bags and go. No one else to clear it with. P.S. That's where I've been since Thursday.
• This morning I had a friend on my heart who is going through a very tough time. I stopped what I was doing and went to visit her, hopefully giving her a little encouragement.
• I do have some catch up to do from being out of town. I was able to run my errands at a time this morning when most people are at work or school, thus making it take a lot less time.

SAH Mom vs. SAH Wife (Changing Seasons)

"Stacy, yes, my mothering years ended way too early. How do I do it? Well, it took me awhile to realize it, but, I still have a responsibility to be a keeper of my home and example to younger women. And, I'm putting a lot more time into being a better wife, which I should have been more consumed with all along. It stinks to have the kids gone, but, it's a new season that I'm learning to adapt to and enjoy."
This was the response I sent to Stacy from www.iwannabehomemade.blogspot.com after she commented on the post I wrote about my youngest child finishing school and leaving home. I decided to expand on it.
When I said it took me awhile to realize what my responsibilities were at this time, I was not exaggerating. When the homeschool years were over I spent many days in tears wondering what do I do now? I cried and prayed about what I was supposed to be doing. Am I supposed to go to work, if so, where? What does God want me to do with the rest of my life? I worked several temporary jobs, but, knew they were not something I would want to do long term. I did not feel qualified for what I felt was a worthwhile career or even know what that career would be. I would become depressed and down on myself. My husband at times was concerned and thought if I just got out of the house and got a job it would help me(and our finances). All my life I just wanted to be a homemaker. I had never dreamed of anything else. As I read article after article, everyone is talking about how important it is to be a stay at home mom. Well, my mom days were over, did that mean I didn't need to be home any more? As I mentioned, I prayed and prayed wondering why I wasn't getting an answer.
Well, when I went to the Word of God, the answer was right in front of me. Titus 2:3-5 says that the older women are to teach the younger women to...be keepers at home... As I read this over and over I kept wondering, how can the older woman teach the younger women this if they are not at home? What kind of example am I setting for them? If I am suddenly able to acquire more money and things that I never could before until I went to work, couldn't my daughter see this and be tempted to do the same thing?
I firmly believe God has called me to be a stay at home wife. Since I have accepted this, I am now at peace. I have put myself into making my home better than it ever was and being a better helpmeet to my husband. I am really enjoying this new season in my life now.
P.S. I would love to read your comments on this subject.